The beat of the Miao drum rumbles
fiercely like thunder, like the beating heart of a people whose hope for
freedom sways with the flickering of a candle’s flame. Blood splatters everywhere, the cries of
injustice echoing throughout the majestic hillsides. I walk through the scene one last time, untainted
by its brutality. I feel like a mere helpless
transparent ghost who can only glance from afar. No matter how much I scream, no matter how
much my heart ache with theirs—I can do nothing now. The two worlds are drifting apart and I am
being pulled back to the life I once knew.
I
stare at an oil-painting of a young and beautiful Manchu princess sitting next
to her husband. “Isn’t she beautiful?” I
ask. “But she’s not coming back. That’s the path that she has chosen. Don’t worry.
Perhaps that’s her fate. She will
be happy there.” I smile, and my
stepmother weeps.
But
deep down in my heart, I know that I will miss her—my half-sister. In this lifetime, I will never meet her again. This is my punishment, for neglecting a
beloved sister in this world and for turning an innocent young lady into a
demon. But no matter how much hatred is
in her heart, perhaps she is the stronger one; the one who is willing to trade
a life here for that life there, simply to be able to live with him and be
loved for who she is.
It
is me, who is the real coward. Like I’ve
abandoned her here, I have once more decided to abandon him there.
Every time I close my
eyes, I still see him standing there—playing his qeej beautifully and happily beside
the luxuriant blue bamboo forest. The
waterwheels cranked melodically and harmonically, pouring clear water into the river
that was so clear the pebbles at the bottom appeared liked a well-played chess game. That’s the image that I want to forever
remember of him.
But I know his ending
too well. Whether I stay with him or
not, I cannot change what is predestined to happen. It is better that I not see his tragic
ending.
Love,
however, is something that defies the test of time, the will of heaven, and the
laws of the universe. No matter where we
both are, our hearts will always be together.
I know that in spring when I admire
the pink blooming plum buds, he smiles with me; in summer when my hands are
touching the cool June rain, his hands are brushing past the dripping heavenly
water too; in autumn when the dancing leaves make my heart withers, he too
longs for my presence; and in winter when snowflakes flutter gracefully to weave
the earth ground into a soft blanket, we will both walk together under the
magical winter moonlight. With every
step I take to glide forward, he moves with me.
Although we can no longer see each other, we’ve never parted…
So
they are among us and we are among them.
The two worlds march forward in synchrony and harmony. We need their world to keep going so that we
may be their future. And we need to keep
going so that our descendants may have a future. And thus the two worlds continue to move
apart with every click of time until someday when the right conditions bring the
parallel worlds to meet once more...
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